“Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you.”
—H. Jackson Brown Jr.
Today’s story is contributed by Robert Dilenschneider.
A late night phone call. To my surprise, Dad took it in the solitude of the basement. In hushed, urgent tones he spoke,
“I’m sorry, I’ve got to do it. I hope you’ll be able to understand.”
Huddled beneath the basement steps, in my secret spot, I could hear the tension in his voice.
Thus begins one of my earliest and most powerful lessons from Dad, a portrait of virtue, and an example of standing one’s ground.
A young Robert and his father, Dil
My father, Sigmund John Dilenschneider, or “Dil” as he was known, was a newspaperman. The son of a middle class weaver, he had worked his way through school, culminating in his graduation from the esteemed Wharton School of Business in Philadelphia.
It was at Wharton, in the midst of the Great Depression in the 1930’s, that he met and married my mom. For a time they were forced to live apart with parents and friends — too poor to afford an apartment together.
But back to that basement call…
The caller was a representative of Cousins & Fern, a major department store in Columbus, Ohio. They were also the biggest advertiser in Dad’s newspaper. A high profile executive with the store had just committed suicide. The man on the line was urging Dad to keep the story out of the paper.
Dad said he couldn’t. He promised to present the story respectfully. He pledged not to splash it across the front page. But the story would run. A long silence ensued…
Robert as a boy
What I know now — the man on the phone delivered an ultimatum — quash the story, or Cousins & Fern would pull all of its advertising.
My dad didn’t flinch, “I’m sorry, I’ve got to do it, and I hope you can understand why. We would like to retain your advertising, but not this way.” My father hung up.
Dad ran the story. Cousins & Fern pulled all their business.
A few days later, Fred Lazarus, founder of the Federated Department Store chain, called my father. He invited him to his office. Lazarus was surprised to learn that Cousins & Fern had discontinued advertising. It meant, though, that Lazarus could increase his own investment in the paper. In fact, he said, he wanted to put Cousins & Fern out of business… which is precisely what happened.
Lazarus doubled his advertising commitment. Dad’s paper was safe. Cousins & Fern folded.
Freedom of speech was not a just a term of speech or meaningless phrase to my father. His responsibility to his readers to tell the truth, and not hold back newsworthy events, meant everything. His reputation meant more than money or fame.
My dad had what you might call “Printegrity” — integrity in every word he allowed into print.
A newspaperman through and through, he was not willing to compromise on that.
Dad’s stance, his Printegrity, could have destroyed the newspaper he had worked so hard to build. But he was willing to take that chance.
His reputation in the community, his ability to sleep soundly at night… this meant so much more.
Because of my dad, I try every day to live exactly that way.
Robert today
Robert L. Dilenschneider is founder and Chairman of The Dilenschneider Group, a global public relations and communications consulting firm headquartered in New York City. He is the author of eight books — including the best-selling “Power and Influence: The Rules Have Changed.”